Castlewood Eating Disorder Treatment Center Blog

Category Archives: Alumni and Family

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Tuesdays With Tammy: Balancing Nourishment and Pleasure

At Castlewood, we believe that balancing nourishment and pleasure respects both health and taste. Respecting your health embraces fueling the body with a variety of food that provides carbohydrate energy, protein building blocks, and foundation fats. Respecting your taste embraces enjoyment of food as equally valuable and important. Perfection is not necessary or required to respect your health and nourish your body because our bodies have an amazing capability of balancing. Example: If we do not put enough water from the outside in, our body will balance by holding more fluids from the inside out.  Another example: If we eat…

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One Choice. One Life.

Written by S.H., Castlewood Alumnus Do I want to live a life worth living, or do I want to live a life with my eating disorder — one that won’t last very long? This was a question I faced a little over a year ago… a question that I didn’t know the answer to at the time. I had struggled with my eating disorder for many years and had gone to treatment various times, and yet I kept relapsing with little hope and a diminishing desire to get better. I doubted that recovery was possible for me even though my…

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Experiencing Life, Love and Recovery

Written by L. M. Castlewood Alumnus  Falling in love makes you vulnerable, it is probably the most vulnerable thing you will ever do in your life to love someone and to allow them to love you in return, the real you, the good and bad and everything that falls in between. Eating disorders are incredibly isolating, I know mine was, I did not think anyone could understand the pain I felt or the sadness I had and I did not think anyone but my eating disorder could help me. That is a convenient story we tell ourselves to keep us…

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If Not Now… When?

Submitted by Castlewood Alumni “Somewhere in the archives of crudest instinct is recorded the truth that it is better to be endangered and free than captive and comfortable.” – Tom Robbins For the longest time, I thought I was comfortable with where I was in life. I gave off the impression that I was happy and satisfied. But after some time, I came to realize that I was really just settling because I did not believe (and I was too afraid) that life couldn’t get any better. I was too set in my beliefs and my comfort zone to really…

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If Not Now… When? by Paul Beuttenmuller Castlewood Alumnus

“Somewhere in the archives of crudest instinct is recorded the truth that it is better to be endangered and free than captive and comfortable” – Tom Robbins For the longest time, I thought I was comfortable with where I was in life. I gave off the impression that I was happy and satisfied. But after some time, I came to realize that I was really just settling because I did not believe (and I was too afraid) that life could get any better. I was too set in my beliefs and my comfort zone to really open up and admit…

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One Choice. One Life.

Written by Sarah Kate Hutchison, Castlewood Alumnus                Do I want to live a life worth living, or do I want to live a life with my eating disorder — one that won’t last very long? This was a question I faced a little over a year ago… a question that I didn’t know the answer to at the time. I had struggled with my eating disorder for many years and had gone to treatment various times, and yet I kept relapsing with little hope and a diminishing desire to get better. I doubted that recovery was possible for me…

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Surrendering to the Slow Process of Recovery

Guest Post by Alumnus, M.W. I have been thinking of what to write here for a while and hoped at some point something poignant and spot on would sort of appear on the paper. I’m laughing at this now because it completely mirrors the way I have approached recovery for so long; hoping that one day everything snaps into place, the path becomes clear and I mindfully walk off into the sunset, never to look back. I make jokes often with my team about wanting to expedite this recovery process and they compassionately remind me that it doesn’t work that way.…

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Learning to Be Okay With “Not Knowing”

By Annie Wittenberg, Castlewood Alumnus Subtext: I Don’t Always Have to Have an Answer… (And that is such a relief!) “I don’t know!!!” I said vehemently. “What is it you don’t know?” Laura Wood asked, after the second expressive session of alumni weekend. “I don’t know what I don’t know!” I exclaimed frustrated with myself. I was hoping Laura was about to give me homework that would clarify my confusion. Laura smiled and told me my “homework” for the night was to listen to the Beatles’ song Let it Be. I was like seriously Laura?! That’s my homework? (I may…

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